10 Gift Ideas for the Obnoxious Coffee Snob in Your Life
Coffee snobs are the worst.
I know, because I'm one of them.
Even worse is that whenever a friend or family member talks to me about anything coffee-related, they think I'm judging their coffee interests to the depths of their souls.
This is especially true for coffee gifts.
I can see the trepidation in their eyes when they take on the seemingly daunting task of finding me a coffee gift that will satisfy my snobbery.
But even though it's a challenging task, I still appreciate a thoughtful coffee gift. After all, it is the thought that counts, right?
But wouldn't it still be awesome if you could get a coffee snob a gift that they didn't have to pretend to be excited about?
Hell yeah it would!
So without further ado, here are 10 gift ideas for even the most obnoxious coffee snob…
You can't officially call yourself a coffee snob until you own a Chemex coffeemaker.
So if your coffee-snob-gift-recipient does not already own a Chemex, it's time to help them up onto the bandwagon.
Even if they never use it to brew a single cup of coffee because they swear by, say, the Kalita Wave, it will at least make a great conversation piece the next time they have someone over for coffee.
“I love your vase, Benji!”
You can read my review of the Chemex coffee maker here.
9. Kruve Coffee Sifter
A coffee snob may ask you this intimidating question, but don't despair!
Chances are good that your coffee snob has not been doing their sifting reps either.
This is probably because traditionally, coffee sieves have been both expensive and inaccessible.
The Kruve coffee sifter has changed this (at least to some extent).
“What is a coffee sifter?” you may be asking yourself.
Well, it's basically a tool that we coffee snobs like to use to get a precise and consistent grind size for the specific coffee brewing method we're using.
You know, cuz our $300+ burr grinders aren't doing a good enough job already. Fortunately, the Kruve is way more reasonably priced.
8. Lido 3 Coffee Grinder
The Lido 3 hand grinder by Orphan Espresso is probably the most popular coffee grinder you've never heard of.
Unless of course, you're a coffee snob.
This grinder has a cult following amongst coffee enthusiasts (euphemism for “snob”), so it's sure to be a winner if the coffee snob in your life doesn't already own one.
Why is it so popular?
Well, mostly because it grinds coffee really quickly and consistently across a wide range of grind sizes. It is also created and sold by a mom-and-pop shop out of Idaho.
Lido has been on my list for too long now. I think I'll finally succumb to my snobbery and buy one this year.
If you're an avid Shark Tank fan like me, you might have seen these guys strike a deal with Barbara Corcoran not too long ago.
Who knew that Barbara was a coffee snob too!?Third Wave Water is a small capsule filled with a mineral concoction that is allegedly optimal for brewing coffee.
Simply add the powder from the capsule to a gallon of distilled or RO water, shake thoroughly, and you've got standardized water for brewing coffee.
Though I've been using Third Wave Water sporadically throughout the last year, I've been putting off a review because I am not patient enough to figure out how to measure if it's making a difference or not.
I also live in San Francisco where the tap water is already quite good, so it's hard to say how much of a difference Third Wave Water actually makes.
Still, Third Wave Water is an excellent way to get consistency from your water, allowing coffee snobs to focus on all of the other unnecessary brewing variables we obsess over (e.g. pouring clockwise vs. counter-clockwise, duh).
You can buy Third Wave Water on Amazon here.
Acaia scales seem to be in every Specialty Coffee shop in existence right now.
Not only do the scales connect to your smartphone or tablet to record things like, weight, flow rate, and brew time, but the scales themselves are also some of the most responsive and accurate in the industry.
If your coffee snob doesn't already own an Acaia scale, chances are they've been eyeing one for a while now.
5. VST Coffee Refractometer
Coffee refractometers are only for the snobbiest of coffee snobs.
Well actually, this may not necessarily be true.
You see, refractometers are used to measure the amount of actual coffee that is extracted into your final brewed up.
Measured in total dissolved solids, a coffee with a higher TDS has a higher extraction, and therefore would likely be described as strong coffee by the end consumer.
Coffee professionals often use refractometers as a way to use quantitative data to accompany their subjective tasting opinions.
This is very anti-coffee-snob in a way, since a coffee snob would simply tell you a coffee was good because he brewed it as pour-over, in a Chemex, pouring in consistent counter-clockwise circles of 30g of water at a time.
So let's just say that the refractometer is perfect for a coffee snob who's willing to use TDS data to back up his dogmatic coffee routines.
The VST is quite expensive, but you can learn more about it here.
There is also a cheaper alternative on Amazon made by Atago that I'm inclined to try first. You can check that out here.
There are a lot of home coffee roasters on the market these days, but the Gene Café is one that is frequently recommended for a coffee snob's standards.
It can roast about a half a pound of green coffee beans at a time, using “vortex twisting” for a uniform roast across all beans.
Both the time and temperature can be controlled, while the whole roast cycle takes about 15 minutes (including cooling) for a Full City roast level.
This is a great choice for any coffee snob who is looking to start roasting coffee at home.
You can buy the Gene Café Roaster from My Espresso Shop here.
Blind coffee cuppings and coffee snobbery don't really align if you ask me. But this doesn't change the fact that a lot of coffee snobs still like to guess origins and processing methods in annual competitions like the Flight of Fancy from Populace Coffee.
So to some degree, I feel like I have to include Angels' Cup on this list because we coffee snobs really enjoy the ego boost we get from correctly guessing a coffee's specs just by tasting it.
You can read my full review here.
Let's face it, the main reason a coffee snob would want this machine is because it looks so damn sexy.
The Rocket Appartamento is a semi-automatic espresso machine that was designed for serious home baristas. It features an all-stainless steel body with a 1.8 liter copper boiler.
The Heat Exchanger allows you to pull your shots and steam your milk simultaneously, which is important if you're looking to make your drinks quickly.
Of course, you'd probably only want to buy this for a coffee snob you really care about, as it retails for a whopping $1500. Still, in relative terms this is inexpensive for the quality this machine brings to the table.
1. Coffee Brewing Dice
James Hoffmann made it into this year's general coffee gift guide with his excellent book, The World Atlas of Coffee, and now he's on this list as well with his latest release: Coffee Brewing Dice for the AeroPress.
I think this is a fun and inexpensive gift that will help melt the ice off of any stubborn coffee snob, as it allows one to come up with a random AeroPress recipe for every time they brew.
Now your coffee snob will not have to obsessively try and replicate the latest winning recipe from the World AeroPress Championships and instead maybe start brewing their AeroPress recipes more randomly.
These dice may be the solution!
What did I miss? What will you buying the coffee snob on your list?
Of course, there are hundreds (if not thousands) of other potential coffee gifts that even a coffee snob would appreciate, but these 10 should help get you started.
So tell me, what are some great gifts for coffee snobs that I missed?
Let us know by leaving a comment below!